It's Time To Do It...

Hi Readers,

This is sort of a sequel to my last post, as it prompted a lot of thought, but more importantly, some action. We often have time on our hands, but often don't use this time to get things done.

We al have things to do that forever get put off because there are always "more important things to do"

Agree?

I've been a great list maker each day of the things I need to get done at work or at home, and some tasks are perennial list cloggers! Just like that player on your AFL list that is always there, only plays the occasional game/s and never seems to get delisted.

So, these holidays I decided to have a crack at getting my list cloggers done. Admittedly, I knew that I was going to be around as I couldn't make plans to go away as I have been waiting to see when my surgeon is booking me in for my next renovation. Previous experience has been that I have been booked in with a few weeks notice, but then my last one was only 2 days notice. So, I sort of knew that I would be able to knock over a few jobs that have been front and centre. Some are minor, others more challenging as you'll soon see.

Possibly the kickstarter was selling Jen's car.

We bought this car for Jen 2 years ago and she only had it for one week before her diagnosis. She only got to drive it for a few days as she was immediately put into hospital and wasn't able to drive it again.

After her passing there was obviously no need for me to have two cars, so I put both hers and mine up for sale to see which one would sell first. As it turned out, mine sold quickly so I kept hers for the time being, but placed an order for a new car as hers was too small for me and my future plans.

My new car was taking ages to arrive (it still hasn't, so I bought something different that I'm happier with anyway) so now I was stuck with two cars again.

In the 12 months since we lost Jen I had only 2-3 serious inquiries about her car, but as the car market was changing as the Covid restrictions were lifting, I was beginning to think I'd never sell it. Lo and behold, in the week that I took delivery of my new car, I managed to sell Jen's to a lovely lady here in Bendigo. I did take a hit price wise, but was still happy with the sale. Maybe a special angel was looking over me that week.

I have to admit that it was a hard decision to part with her car, but as I said, it was too small for the plans I have in moving forward. Watching it drive away did pull at the heart strings, but I know that he lady who bought it is happy with it.

So there we are, my first major job done.

I think this gave me the strength to begin the next job, one that I have tried so many times to do but have stopped as soon as I have started.

Cleaning out Jen's wardrobe.

I just can't call it "getting rid of Jen's things" as some people say to me, but every time I see them it is hard to take as well.

Selling her car was the impetus and I now knew that the time was right. A few days beforehand I was in Melbourne, and the very visual sight of the many homeless people wearing scrappy clothes prompted me to begin the process. Jen was always a massive supporter of Vinnies and regularly donated anything that she didn't wear much, so where to take them was an easy decision.

Now the hard part. As soon as I started to take various pieces off the coat hangers or out of the drawers I was immediately flooded with memories of when she was wearing that particular piece. Not every single item of course, but pretty much each item that she wore most, or on special occasions. This was something out of my control and really surprised me. At times a smile would be on my face, most other times I'd get shiny eyes or even a few tears. I knew that I had to keep going, but I didn't just stuff the items into the garbage bags. I took time to reminisce about the ones that brought back the most memories. After gathering quite a few bags it was off to Vinnies and even that was hard to do. People have told me that I should take them to a different town so that I don't see the clothes on someone else, but for the life of me I don't think that I'd recognise them on someone else. If anything, I'm just happy to see them being put to good use by people who need them. They aren't benefitting anyone by sitting in our wardrobe. I'm also sure that Jen would have done the same with my clothes had the roles been reversed.

Not everything went however. I have kept just a few items hanging up to remember her by, ones that instantly bring back all that was so great about her.

Car done. Clothes done. Now the Study.

This has stared me down each time I head to the garage to get into the car. Two desks, two chairs and lots of files and school supplies etc.

Just like the clothes ( I went through my stuff first to find items to donate) I went through my part of the study and cleaned out anything that could go.

Then I started with Jen's things, files etc. 

Likewise with the clothes, there were a number of emotions stirred as I went though bags, files, drawers etc and removed things that were outdated or no longer needed.

Similarly, I have kept a few items in there of hers just to maintain her memory.

I think that getting these three jobs done at the start of the holidays has been a massive icebreaker for me and enabled me to get other things done now. If I'd left them too late in the hols then there is every chance that they wouldn't get done at all.

There is a huge feeling of guilt attached to clearing out many of her things and that still troubles me, but the fact that they are going to someone else who needs them is a consoling factor.

Now the other tasks....

The warmer weather means good conditions for a hobby of mine, Home Brewing.

Without really checking the stash in the shed, I went and got two barrels going and they'll be ready to bottle in the next day or so.

I even put them in the spare bathroom where the temperature is better, I hope Jen won't mind!!

After doing this I ventured out into the shed to tidy up my stash so that I had room for the 120 stubbies that would come from these two barrels.

I must have been a bit slack over the past 12 months in calculating how much beer, cider and ginger beer I might need, because my storage system has been somewhat neglected .

Imagine my shock when I actually find that I have hundreds of stubbies of beer, cider and ginger beer, and now I'm going to add another 120!!!

And some of them date back 2 years ! (They still taste good though)

I think I may have just got into the habit of continually making, and not using. Sort of a compound interest in beer making.

If only my bank accounts did the same!!

Looks like I might need to invite some people around one night to have a crack at them!

It's amazing how when you start one job, you notice another that needs doing.

As I sit in my lounge room lately I've been noticing some of those pesky Indian Mynah birds hovering around a corner of the roof of our house. As the weather has been so nice lately, I got the ladder out to investigate, thinking that they might be trying to nest in there. Upon getting up, much to my relief there was no chance of this happening, but I did notice a few weeds growing in the guttering, so I pulled them out and threw them down on the grass. Then I noticed a few more, then more still. A quick job to check for a nest resulted in the guttering getting a good clean out. 

But those birds still remain🤬

And what do they say about people over the age of 45 going up ladders!!

Now that my gutters were clean, I now had the weeds tossed over my shoulder and strewn across the lawn.

I'd been thinking about mowing the lawn this weekend (okay, procrastinating) so now that it looked so messy I just got onto it straight away.

Another job done.

I also had a large stack of wall and floor tiles that we were going to use in a renovation of our last house, but sold it before the reno's were done. As well as an expensive marble bathroom sink that was going to be installed.

I've been writing this on my list almost weekly, "Sell the tiles and sink", so while I was on a roll I sat down and placed ads for them.

No replies yet, but at least another of those finicky jobs to do that just never seem to get done.

I mentioned in my last post that I actually found the weeding of the lawns an enjoyable task, and looking out the window now I see that some of the "Spring Weed Specialists" are back, so a few hours out there with the radio on beckons in the next few days.

So Readers, what's in this for you?

Have you got a "List"? 

Things to do that need to be done, but the sky won't fall if they don't get done?

Time on your hands to do them?

I just took the view after selling Jen's car that now is the time to do these things, and that I needed to commit to doing them as I had the time.

For sure, I was quickly able to think of other things to do instead, but the liberating feeling of accomplishing things that have been on my radar for so long has been so refreshing.

The minor tasks such as the lawns, the gutters and the beers haven't caused as much angst, but the cleaning out of the wardrobe was quite an emotionally draining experience. I won't call that a task because I see it as something so much more important.

Okay then readers, I hope that you can now commit to making the time to get one or more of those annoying tasks on your lists done today! I surprised myself with how quickly I got some of them done yesterday.

In finishing, and with no particular relevance to this post, I must share a photo I took in Melbourne last week. This bloke obviously likes a stretch and there is no place where he is shy to do it, Even at the tram stop in Bourke Street!!

Until my next post,

Cheers    😁

When Time is on Your Side

Hi Readers,

One again I notice that it has been quite a while since my last post, and although I could try and justify this with a number of excuses, I won’t bore you with that as you would probably tune out immediately or fall asleep. Or both!!

So what’s this post about then?

I’m sitting on a train heading back to Bendigo from Melbourne and have nothing but time to waste for however long the trip will take. I thought about writing this post on the way down this morning but was so tired that I nodded off very early into the trip.

A few times I found myself suddenly pulling my head upright as I nodded off then trying to look as if “I wasn’t sleeping!”” but this didn’t fool those around me. 

A few times when it happened I noticed a few wry smiles from other passengers who were facing me, who were obviously taking great delight in watching me nod off then awaken with such a start soon after!

I must admit that I find it rather funny watching it happen to others, but when the victim is yourself it does feel a little bit embarrassing I must say. However, I have been dog tired for a few weeks now and whenever I sit down the zzzz’s seem to envelop me straight away.😴💤💤💤💤🥱🥱

Also, I was caught out at school recently when watching a performance that our kids were involved in. It wasn’t a full on nap, but there might have been a little bit of an extended shut-eye. The photo evidence captured from a colleague ruins all chances of denying it, and this colleague has been as happy as a dog with two tails since snapping the said photo!!

I won’t call it blackmail, but he does remind me about it from time to time. Luckily we all see the funny side of it.

We have just started a two week holiday break and it couldn’t have come at a better time. As regular readers would know I have had the body up on the hoist a fair bit over the past few months getting bits fixed, and more is to come. This does make sleeping a bit of a challenge at times, which is partly why I’m continually tired during the day. The kids in my class have been noticing and now keep a tally of my yawns. If they catch me ten times in a day it costs me a chocolate frog to each of them at the end of the week. You might be forming a protest in the streets right now at the thought of me providing junk food to my kids, and I get that. So far it has only cost me 2 frogs each over the past three weeks, so it’s not like I’m force feeding them like they do for some liver pate’s that adorn many cheese platters.

I had been planning to go away to QLD to visit two of our boys and our grandson, but some last minute appointments with a surgeon meant that I couldn’t make any plans as I just didn’t know if I’d be booked in for surgery or not. Last time I saw him on a Saturday afternoon he booked me in for surgery two days later, so I had to be ready for this happening again. As it turns out nothing is going to happen for at least three weeks, so I now have lots of time on my hands. Ironic it is that my hands are part of the problem!!

So for now, that’s why I’m writing this post on a train as I had to go to Melbourne to collect some papers from the bank that were deemed “too important “ to send by mail. I was in and out of the branch in less than ten minutes, but the fact that they lost them a few months ago has meant that it has taken over 12 months to finally collect them.

Now I have the rest of the holidays to do as I please, with no real plans at all, which suits me fine.

In some ways, having no plans at all can be somewhat stressful, as one may feel the pressure to actually have some plans. To an extent I feel this. I do have one commitment that I have to keep in the hols and need to be around in Bendigo for that, but for the rest of the time, the world is my oyster so to speak.

After my introduction you could be forgiven for thinking that I might just sleep in every day, and although I need more sleep, that would drive me nuts as I’m a committed early bird at getting up. If I sleep in past 7.30 I feel like I’ve wasted most of the day already!

As the holidays started on Saturday, I’d already planned to do a massive weeding of our lawns as I’d noticed the usual Spring invasion of some certain weeds. Weirdly, I was actually looking forward to spending a few hours on all fours as I can’t do much physically still due to a recent operation on a hand. I love listening to the footy talkback on the radio and various podcasts, so what better opportunity to do this. 

The novelty did wear off after an hour or two, but the job got done and the lawns look so much better. As soon as I finished I was thinking “Now to mow them”, but I then reminded myself that I had more than enough time on my hands, so the mowing could wait until tomorrow. This did take a bit of willpower as I tend to be someone who goes bull at a gate when it comes to work around the house, and once I start a job I don’t stop until it’s done.

The lawns got done the next day and I still had time on my hands to tend to other things.

After many weeks of squeezing in jobs on weekends due to the weekly work pressures, having all this time to kill is still a bit of a novelty to me. I don’t want to waste it though, so I do need to factor in some elements of plans. 

One thing I have noticed is that I’m observing more things around me and taking note of more things that I see, smell and hear. I had to walk a few km’s on Thursday to pick up Jen’s car as it was getting a RWC prior to being sold the next day. Just that one hour of walking exposed me to so many sounds that felt new to me again, as I haven’t been able to get out and walk for nearly 12 months due to my ankle surgery. I must admit that my ‘walk’ might have only passed as a hobble, but at least I was out again ( and suffering from it still!) It May have been the combination of Spring and some warm weather, but it was amazing how more alert I was to sounds - birds, traffic, people in the street etc. Things that I’d often take for granted, but now that I had more time to enjoy them I was more alert to the prevalence of the variety of these sounds.

I also became more alert to my surroundings and how my experiences lately have been taking me back to other times in my life.

For instance, I had to walk down to the local Hyundai dealer about 30 mins walk away to pick up my new car. It was a bleak, cold, wet and windy day, and as I set off I could feel and hear the rain hitting my raincoat as I walked through the dimly lit streets.

Straight away, and for no reason I immediately thought about a similar time in Prague when Jen and I were leaving our hotel early one morning to travel somewhere else on one of our many overseas trips we took before her passing. I clearly remembered the sound that the rain was making on my jacket that morning in Prague, and the experiencing of it again in Epsom took me back to 2015 in a flash and without prompting.

Early morning in Prague and the rain on my jacket sounded the same and brought back instant memories of this morning.

This really startled me at first, but since that moment I have had similar experiences where something that is happening to me now triggers memories of similar times in the past. Maybe I’m more receptive to it now since it first happened a few weeks ago, but it is occurring regularly now.

Just this morning while I was waiting at the Bendigo train station it took me back to the times when we would be waiting at various train stations across Europe, as invariably we would be travelling early each day, and we made extensive use of the rail network which is just fantastic across Europe.

    

                                                 Bendigo train station early in the morning

I know this looks and sounds a bit bland, but this morning while I was sitting on the platform waiting for my train it reminded me of times waiting on similar platforms at similar times in Berlin, Reggio Emilia, Milan and northern England just to name a few. Just change the names on the platforms, the experience felt the same.

                                  Berlin station early in the morning isn't very different to Bendigo

Maybe because I’m finding more time on my side lately my mind is starting to wander a bit and I’m thinking less about work and more about the present. Usually at night if I have a bit of time on my side because all the house chores have been done, it has been a habit to pull out the laptop and catch up on a bit of schoolwork.

A few weeks ago I made a commitment to catch up on school stuff during the week so that my weekends were free of school work. The first weekend of this was a bit nerve wracking as I kept feeling the urge to do school work as I was so accustomed to doing it, but I didn’t need to do it. The next weekend was even better and I was now finding I had more time on my hands to do things that I wanted to do.

I’m determined to maintain this approach as it is so good to wake up knowing that the day is mine. That’s also why these holidays feel like I have so much time to do what I like as I’m organised work wise already.

I mentioned earlier that I have a new car, so each morning I’m considering just getting in it and heading off somewhere. Trouble is, I still can’t make up my mind where to go. What a problem to have!! 

So Readers, this mindless meandering today has probably left you scratching your heads, thinking “Yep, he’s totally lost it today!”, but what I’m encouraging you to think about is what time do you make for yourself?

Sounds selfish I know, but it’s so important to think about yourself also. It has taken me so long to come around to this, I still have trouble with it. But I know that I can’t be any good to anyone else unless I learn to look after myself too.

We often hear the usual “But I don’t have the time…”. I’ve learnt to call BS on that as we all have the same amount of time no matter who we are. It’s just being able to make the time. 

I recently hit the 60 mark, and this has coincided with me actually beginning to understand and appreciate why we need to give time to ourselves. Yes, still give as much as you can to others, but learn to look after yourself as well.

While I’m still on the train to Bendigo I just had another flashback. As I glanced down the aisle I saw the sign on the ceiling giving updates, it took me back to a time when we were on a train in Italy and the speed limit flashed up. That in itself brought back so many other memories of that trip, memories that might otherwise be suppressed until something triggers them again. I hope that you experience similar triggers and that the memories are joyful ones rather than negative ones.

                       On a train in Germany that we thought was fast, until...

                       We hopped on a train in Italy. Those Italians like things fast!!!

Just in saying that, I’m sure that negative memories may also come flooding back depending on what you experience. Upon reflection, I’m thinking that I tend to have mainly happy memories coming back as I try as much as I can to maintain a positive mindset, which is possibly why only great memories come back at first to me.

This post has been a total jigsaw, good luck trying to piece together all the random thoughts I've banged on about!! Then again, I just like to write about whatever comes to mind, so I'm not fussed too much about it. Hopefully over the next two weeks I can devote some time to some more meaningful posts as there are some great topics that I've come across in some books that I've been reading.

Today's post was started mainly because I didn't want to sleep all the way home on the train, because I feel I've been nodding off too easily of late. Even when I got home I nodded off when I sat down for a little while. I'd better get a good night of sleep tonight!!!

Still have lots more I could write about, but the eyes are getting droopy. Did I mention that I was tired???

Until my next post...

Cheers 😁