A Totally Random Post

Hi Readers,

Usually I have just one thing that motivates a post, but this time I'm going rogue and will just bang on about a number of random things. In no order and without any connections.

Why?

I recently spent 4 days in the car driving up and back to Qld, and had so much time to think about things that I have too many ideas running through my head so I'll just let my fingers do the walking across the keyboard and see what happens.

First of all, a bit over two weeks ago I had my post op appointment with my surgeon after my leg operation. For 7 weeks I wasn't to put my foot on the ground at all and no weight was meant to go through it so that the bone graft would work. At this appointment he was pleased with the progress and finally gave me permission to slowly start putting my leg on the ground again, but I still have to keep the boot on for some time.

This was like being told I could run again, but I must admit that two weeks later I still get timid trying to use that leg again.

So what do I do when I get home?

A spur of the moment decision, I might drive to Qld!!

The rest of that day was spent quickly packing, then planning the trip. I knew that I couldn't drive a really long way in one go yet, so I decided to stay at places that I'd never been to before.

That meant on the first day I drove to Canberra and had big plans to visit so many places.

As I've referred to in many posts, "Big Mistake" !!

The Australian War Museum has always interested me, so off I went on my very cold first morning in Canberra. I think I should have thought a bit more beforehand what a trip to the museum would entail, and I soon discovered that meant LOTS of walking!!!

At first I was fine, but I soon began to realise that doing such a large museum on crutches was going to be a challenge, especially as I have a troublesome shoulder that I may need an op on soon. But persevere I did and I got through the various levels that I wanted to see.

As I was leaving, one of the workers came up to me and said "Next time you visit, just ask us for a mobility scooter"!! I don't think I'll be back there again, and I definitely don't want one of those scooters!!!

Not to be outdone, the next day I showed that I definitely had not learnt my lesson, so I went off to the National Museum. 

Yep, Julia Roberts was screaming in my ear again!!

Apart from my stupid decision, he moment I got in there I discovered that there were a number of school holiday groups visiting, so there were kids everywhere. So many displays were closed or still being built, and there wasn't much else to see anyway.

So the rest of that day was spent touring around Canberra taking in the sights from the comfort of my car.

I still enjoyed my visit there, maybe I might visit again when I'm more mobile.

That night I began to ponder how far I'd travel the next day, so I just decided to pick a place about 7 hours away, and Port Macquarie came up. Never been there before, never heard much about it, so what was there to lose?

Once I got there I was blown away by how nice it was and how much there was to explore, but my Canberra experience meant that I'd just have to be happy with seeing the sights from my car, which I did.

Just beautiful weather and scenery, the photos don't do it justice!

The next day I arrived at Burleigh Heads and spent the next few days visiting another brother in Brisbane, and our two sons, daughter in law and two grandsons in Burleigh.

I was very fortunate to have secured some digs just around the corner from the grandsons, so it only took me 5 minutes to crutch my way around there each day. While the 4 year old quickly understood why I was wearing the moon boot and on crutches, the 18 month old took a while to get used to it. I could have bought the younger one any number of toys to play with, but all he really wanted to do was just make tracks and pathways with my crutches on the floor. I know what I might get him for his next birthday!!

While they were living overseas I had recorded quite a number of books online for them to listen to, and now that they are home I was able to give them a number of new books for their parents (and myself and their Uncle Will) to read with them.

Is there anything better than just sitting down and losing yourself in a book with your own kids and grandkids?

My favourite times

And just as we would read books with our boys as kids, Sam and Phoebe are just great at doing it with their own boys.

After a few days I was back in the car and listening to lots of talkback radio for the next two days. One particular discussion really piqued my interest.

A discussion came on about those "flashes in the pan" in our lives, the people who drift in and out for such a brief time but leave a lasting impression.

This got me thinking about those "randoms" that I have encountered in my travels that have left me with great memories.

Here's just a few...

Jen and I were on a train travelling through Switzerland and sharing a cabin with a similarly aged couple who we discovered were from Israel. For the next few hours we were sharing stories about what we did, what it was like living where we lived and so on. But perhaps the thing that we took most from this encounter was that they also had three sons who were similar ages to our three boys. Comparing what it was like for our boys as they grew up and faced the future was just captivating, so many similarities, but also so many differences. We talked for hours, and could have talked for days, and despite all the fantastic experiences we had on this trip, we seemed to always cherish this moment the most.

We all have friends and acquaintances who we run into from time to time and when leaving we say the usual "We must stay in touch" but never do.

I'm so guilty of this!

As I have mentioned in a previous post, on my recent overseas trip I caught up with two friends in London who I hadn't seen for 44 and 40 years respectively. Of course when I left each of them I said "I'll def catch up next time I visit London", so I sincerely hope that I can honour this as just that experience of seeing them again really made me appreciate our friendships so much more. And it wasn't really that hard to do, but it just meant so much.

Now I think about other friends who I haven't seen in ages who live only a few hours away from me and we keep saying "Let's catch up", but never do. Maybe it's the close proximity that makes us think that we will catch up, but it's more often the case that sometimes this is what stops us from seeing them at all because we just think we will soon.

I def need to put more effort into that.

As I took a small tour bus early one morning from Krakow in Poland to visit Auschwitz-Birkenau, I sat with a young Irish couple for the trip. In those few hours together that day we learnt so much about each other. I was learning about what it was like for them starting out on a life together, and they were just as intrigued asking me what it was like travelling alone after losing Jen. I still think about them a lot and what they are doing now and what their future holds. Just two randoms on a bus, but they made a huge impression on me.

As I was touring through the underground salt mine near Krakow, I was chatting with another young couple from England. As it turns out, they were both Primary teachers, and we just talked about so much about what it was like being a teacher in our respective countries. They were a few years into their careers, and mine had just come to an end, and just like the Irish couple, I learnt so much from these two in just a few hours.

And this story doesn't involve me, but it does involve a friend of mine. Some people were in a pub in England and someone said that wherever you go, someone will know someone that you know. To test this out, one of them stood on a chair in the pub and called for silence. He then said "Does anyone here know  'Bill Smith? (Not his real name, I'll keep it private)

To their surprise, someone yelled out "Is that Bill Smith from ..............? He said the actual town in country Victoria. As it turns out, these people were from the same town as 'Bill Smith' and knew him well. Purely coincidental, but it brought so many laughs that night.

When I got back from QLD, a colleague contacted me to say that a boy from my class last year had a terrible accident last Friday when he was hit by a car when crossing a road and had both legs broken.

I went around to his house yesterday to see him and give a few little gifts and I was shocked at what had happened to him. If anything, it was a real perspective pill for me as I whinge about my pathetic sore leg. What I have is nothing compared to what he has been through and what he is facing. I hope I can shut my mouth about my incidental situation and take stock of those who are facing real problems. He inspired me with his attitude and outlook, I was just so proud of him. I need to be like him.

Keeping to my randomness of this post, when I got home two days ago after two days in the car, I was just knackered, tired and grumpy.

I stepped out into the yard just to check things out and was greeted by this.

When Jen passed away, a group of her closest friends gave me this Camellia tree to remember her by. For the past three years I don't really care much about any plants in the garden as much as this. I do look after all the plants, but this one gets my total attention. The weather here has been cold and bleak, and to arrive home and see the "Jen Tree" as I call it sprouting flowers was just brilliant. How could something so beautiful be happening when everything else was being so bleak?

More about that in a moment.

Whenever I'm feeling a bit flat, just a glance out the window from my armchair always brings me back to reality.

God Bless you Secret Seven!!!!! ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

There was also something else growing in the garden, and I'll try to clean it up once this rain clears off, but with the recent publicity about mushrooms in our part of the world, they are not really the plant of choice at the moment!!

I def won't be trying them out!!

Finally Readers, and this has been really tough, our family lost another member yesterday when our much loved brother Tony passed away after a battle with Leukaemia for the past 20 months or so.

Tony was diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukaemia, the same as which Jen had.

Jen had a stem cell transplant and got the all clear after 100 days, but other issues arose that eventually took her life after just 10 months from diagnosis.

So going through it all again with Tony has just brought back everything. Not that I have forgotten any of it, but hearing and seeing all that he went through has been so hard to see happening so soon after Jen's passing.

I was the donor for his first transplant which was successful after 100 days, but it was not long after that it returned. I found this so hard to take, as I already felt that I wasn't able to help Jen, and now I felt the same towards Tony. I know that sounds ridiculous, but sometimes one just can't control how they feel.

A second transplant from his daughter, and once again the all clear after 100 days, but not long after things went the wrong way. Without going into detail, various challenges presented, culminating in Tony going back into hospital recently, and passing away early yesterday morning. We also lost a sister to cancer just before Jen passed away, so the last 3 years have been pretty rough.

I didn't want this post to end on such a downer, but it is what it is.

The first of two days donating stem cells for his first transplant.

A quick visit after the second day of cell harvesting.

Tony was inspiring in the way that he approached his illness, always being upbeat, positive and taking care to not let us worry about him. I didn't hear one complaint from him, he just always accepted what was happening and kept fighting no matter how ill he felt.

In the end, it just became too much.

Rest peacefully Tacka, much loved and always remembered ♥️

Well Readers, that's a post about random stuff that just helps me to gather my thoughts here today after such a shitty past few days. And I haven't checked for typos, so when you see one, ignore it!!

I'm sure that I'll walk out the door today (okay, I'll crutch it) and there will be something new to write about.

Until my next post,

Cheers 🥹

 People are Important!

Hi Readers,

As usual I have just been waiting for some random event to prompt this post, and just as sure as regular surgery, something popped up earlier this week. I've sat on it for a few days and it must have prompted further examples to happen, or perhaps I just become more aware of and perceptive of them.

And in simple terms, it is all about how important people are.

No frills or bells and whistles about this, but often the most obvious things to us are neglected for that very reason.

This all started on Tuesday  when a great friend and former colleague contacted me to say that another former colleague was being farewelled at school the next day, and would I like to come out and be part of it. This person being farewelled did my farewell when I left at the end of last year, so it was something I was really looking forward to as he has become a very close personal friend.

At first I was excited at the prospect, but then I began to feel a tad anxious as I didn't want to be seen as someone who couldn't stay away after leaving. Life moves on, and as I had decided to retire it was time for me to move on to the next phase of my life. But the thing that swayed me was the fact that this person had been so generous to me in so many ways, I felt it was disrespectful to not be there to see him off.

So off I went.

It was great to actually get out of the house for a little while, as I'm turning into "Nut Job Bob" from just sitting around all day while this leg takes its time to heal. Admittedly, I do go out for a short drive each day just to get out of the house, but this time I was going to actually be around people. All the time I have spent alone this year does tend to change you socially, and while I'm quite content with my own company, the prospect of being around so many people again did seem a tad daunting to me.

My nervousness was wiped away the moment I stepped into the front office of the school, and straight away I realised this was what I had been missing, the interaction with people. 

I know that I interact with people whenever I do my shopping etc, but that is different. This was interaction with genuine smiles and warmth, and it was just so humbling after not having seen these people for about 7 months. The brief discussion wasn't about anything to do with school or work, it was about each other and just focussing on the person.

Then when I went into the larger room where the farewell was being done it was just so great to catch up with so many of the people who I had worked with so closely over the  11 years I'd spent at that school.

When I chatted with each person, it struck me later that we didn't talk about school, as that was where our connection was, but we talked about each other. It was valuing the person, rather than just banging on about work.

People ARE important!!

When I made eye contact with different people, I was finding that I wasn't seeing them in their roles anymore, but rather as how I felt to see them again. I was very fortunate to have had pretty good relationships with just about everyone there, so there wasn't any awkwardness from thinking "Geez, I hope I don't run into that person again"

Last year at meetings I would generally see people as their role more than the person. This week I couldn't have given a stuff about what their role was anymore, I was just happy to see that person again, and with the quick chats I had with different people, none of the discussion was about school. 

It was about people.

The only thing that disappointed me about the visit was that I didn't get the chance to just even say a quick hello to so many others, especially when they had to leave to go back to their classrooms. The whole time I was there I was looking around at familiar faces and the first memories that were coming back were about what good people they were, and not what their job was. Any previous work hassles that may have occurred were forgotten as they were now totally irrelevant. It was all about how these people made me feel, as that is what always stays with me the most, more than what they may have done with me. I suppose there is a lesson there for all of us, in that it may not be what we do to others that counts, but how we make them feel.

People first.

Little wonder as I was leaving the building I was having a 'warm fuzzy' as I was just feeling so privileged to have been able to have spent just a short time with people who I probably didn't show enough appreciation to in recent years, but now I know how important it is to do so. The rest of my day I was in just the best place.

As I have alluded to in previous posts, once you start thinking more about one particular thing, even more similar experiences come to mind.

And here is a really obscure example that occurred more than 25 years ago when, in another life I was actually teaching Japanese!

Yep, I hear you now, "That's B.S.!!"

           Detaramane たらめ

Well it's true Readers, I did teach it it for 3 years. I'm not suggesting that any of the kids learnt anything, but at least I was up the front "teaching" it!!!

I can still get by with a smattering of it, but like most things, if you don't use it you lose it.

Anyway, I was with a group of travelling Japanese students and they showed me some photos of themselves at various landmarks around Australia. What struck me however was that while I could see all the people in the photos, the landmark or tourist attraction was usually obscured, or hardly seen at all.

When I questioned them about this they told me that they could always find a photo of these landmarks at any time. But what was more important to them was who was there with them at the time, and what stories they could tell from each photo and the people in it. They were more concerned about who was in the photo than where the photo was actually taken. This reinforces to me how much they value people more than material things.

This has stayed with me since and has influenced what photos I take, where and who with.

On various trips around Australia and overseas I have taken thousands of photos, and the ones that I look at the most or spend the most time looking at are the ones with family and friends in them. This is because they bring back the stories associated with each photo and other things that happened at that time.

For example

Lake Louise in Canada. Nearly the most beautiful place I have been to.

   The same day at the same place, but when I look at this photo it immediately brings back so many memories of that day, where we went, who we were with and so on. Just by having someone else in the photo makes it more meaningful. Even if it was just me, I doubt that the photo would have the same effect

My recent trip that included London. I've seen this bridge so many times, but practically had to force myself to take the photo, just to add to the collection from this trip. It didn't really add to the trip as I had nothing much to share about it. I was just walking near it, so thought I'd better take a photo. Who knows, you might be thinking that I just googled this shot!!

This photo was taken many years earlier and brings back so many more memories about what we did that day, what happened before and after the photo, and who took it.

Just by looking at it now I suddenly remember that it was just so windy that day. For the life of me, I can't remember what the weather was like in the previous photo, and that was only 10 weeks ago!!

While I'm talking about overseas trips, as I think back about the 5 weeks I spent overseas earlier this year, the strongest and most lasting memories come from my first week in NYC where I was seeing our son, his wife and the grandsons each day. We didn't do anything really dramatic each day, other than just enjoy time together. When I do look back at where we went (Central Park daily, Brooklyn Bridge etc) my lasting memories are what we spoke about, how we decided where and what to eat, how to engage the two boys etc. It was the people part that was important. I also had some time to myself where I did the obligatory tourist things, but the memories I'll take away from NYC are what I did with the people I was with.

Just to get this shot took about 8 tries as Henry was pulling faces!!

I guess this goes to show that when I flick back through l the photos I took on this trip, the ones that I look at the most are the ones including the people who I care about so much, as there are so many stories to tell about that photo. 

While all the other photos that I took around Poland, Switzerland, Germany and London are still good to remember things, they just don't seem to generate the same long lasting memories.

While I'm eternally grateful for the fortunate experiences I get to have, the ones that I tend to value the most are the ones that I've shared with people.

So Readers, I'm not suggesting that you have to try and save up for an overseas trip to experience something similar to this. That has just been part of my luck to be able to do it.

It can start at home, just like mine did a few days ago where I went out to my old school for a farewell. Or it could be when you are struggling to put your bins out and you get sprung by your neighbour who gives you a well intentioned telling off for not asking them to do it. (Bless you Katie!!)

With my current situation where I'm slightly incapacitated I have been overwhelmed by the amount of help and support that has come my way from so many for the most simplest of tasks. I probably dwell on it too much, but it doesn't hide the fact that I just continually see the goodness in people and must remember to be grateful for it.

The events of this week, and the way that it has made me think more about the need to be more appreciative of other people for even just the tiniest of things hasn't been a revelation, but more of a kick in the bum to just stop and think about doing it more often.

It's something very easy to forget and neglect, but who knows how much your simple gesture might just change that person's day.

A bit of a different angle today, but I just felt the need to write about it.

Until my next post,

Cheers 😁