The One Armed Bandit

Hi Readers

Another post not so long after my last one!

The real reason for being so 'organised' is because I'm sort of housebound for a few days, even though I'll duck out later for an appointment that I just can't bear to miss.

As I wrote in my last post I was booked in to have an operation on one of my hands to try and correct an ongoing problem with my fingers ( 4 ops on them so far) and to address the carpal tunnel problem in that hand. In a few weeks I'll get the other hand done, just waiting to see how this one responds first. So yesterday I went in and got stage 1 done.

I still just have to laugh at what I have needed to get done in the past few years, because what else is there to do?? As I have had a few ops on my fingers lately I knew what to expect and once home it has been relatively easy to do most tasks, they just take longer.

Until this time.

From what the surgeon told me I have had the usual finger work done on my pointer, but the carpal tunnel involves going into the palm of my hand and wrist. I don't know what it looks like, but as the anaesthetic from yesterday has nearly worn off, the feeling is slowly returning, and it's not great I can tell you that much!! Let me be clear throughout this Readers, I'm not complaining about it, and as I started with, I now just laugh about it.

I was expecting things to be a tad more difficult to do, but not to this extent, and I'm discovering more by the minute what I can or can't do. It has been more of the mundane things we do that have peed me off the most. Remember my last post on 'Autopilot?' Where we do things without thinking? Well I never fully realised just how many things we do without even thinking, and I really mean WITHOUT thinking!! Good old muscle memory can be a real bitch at times. And please don't come at me with "Oh please, it's just a sore hand", I'm just taking a light hearted look at how it has caused me to really stop and focus on things that I never think twice about, that's all.

The shower was a bit of a circus act this morning. I got the freezer bag on my arm okay, but then manipulating the masking tape around it took some organising. I realised that I should have torn off a strip first because that's easier than trying to twirl the full roll around my arm. And then once in the shower it became clear that I mostly wash myself with my right hand. What happens to the bits I can't reach?? I have to keep my arm elevated and dry, so even with the bag on it I am so determined not to get it wet. It happened with one of my previous ops and caused a bit of damage, so this time it is NOT happening!! Firstly, how do I pump the body wash? I tried with one hand but couldn't pump and catch it in the same motion. So I tried pumping with the elbow on my bagged hand and it sort of worked. Then lathering up! Well at least most of the body got cleansed. 

Sorry if I'm creating disturbing mental pictures for you all!!!

Getting dry. Like me, do you basically follow the same ritual and pattern when drying yourself? If unsure, think about it when you dry yourself next. I'd automatically go to do one manoeuvre but then be quickly reminded by my body "Not today buddy!!" I'm definitely going to plan the next shower carefully so I can get it over and done with.

As if that didn't crap me off, then when I went to clean my teeth it became clear I needed to use my opposite hand. Once again all my muscle memory counted for nothing, and even when I'd finished there was this nagging feeling that I hadn't cleaned them well enough even though it took twice as long.

Doing the washing was easy enough, until it came to hanging it on the line. I know it's a relatively simple task, but as I can't grip anything with my hand yet I had to try and hold the washing on the line and peg it with the same hand.

I could just go on and on with boring detail about how I am doing things one handed, but that will be as tedious for me writing it as it would be for you reading it. That's if you are still reading now !!

In my last post I recall mentioning how I can tend to drop 'F-Bombs' on autopilot. Well, the past two days have seen me using my potty mouth as if it is my first language!!!

As I have been under the knife a bit over the years, and a few more coming, I have often been asked how many times in total I've been in for something. I sort of had an idea, but until I sat down and actually tallied them up I wasn't overly impressed or proud of what I came up with. Most have been due to the effects of sport. Whether that be collision injuries or just stress and overuse, they are all my own fault so I have no-one to blame except myself. But a few others are due to age, genetics and my own lack of coordination at times !!!

So this is a snapshot of the ones I can remember. Add to this a number of concussions playing football with two of them requiring stays in hospital. That probably explains my mental state and capabilities!!!! I haven't included my appendix operation from 18 months ago as I just consider that a bit of age wear and tear.

A friend sent me a message the other day joking that I must be trying to be the Six Million Dollar Man ( some of you younger than me might need to Google that one). We have always maintained our Health Insurance, even when money was tight, but boy have I needed it in the past few years. I have definitely made the most of it, counting myself extremely lucky to have it when so many others are unable to. If I had to fork out the cost from my own pocket it wouldn't be near the 6 million dollar mark, but I know the figure is relatively high to say the least.

While I might not be feeling on top of the world physically today, I just pinch myself when I look around at where I am. It is the most glorious day and I'm sitting outside in the yard writing this and listening to my favourite tunes. Life couldn't be much better than right now. I'm not much of a gardener, but things are green and they are growing, so that has to be a plus!

And to add to the enjoyment of the garden, I've been wandering around barefoot on the grass and just loving the softness of it between my toes. And while enjoying this, I soon discovered how soothing the cool grass was in the shade, but at the same time I was loving the warm feel of the grass in the sun. I must have looked like a proper dork stepping from shade to sun and back again multiple times trying to decide which one I preferred most. In the end I called it a truce. 

Well Readers, this is a very short and sharp post, mainly because it is slightly uncomfortable trying to type. I only really started it because I'm just sooooo bored being stuck at home for a few days, and just needed to do something to kill some time.

I'm starting a new book tomorrow so hopefully there will be some gems of inspiration in there to inspire my next post.

Until then,

Cheers 😁